For Linda & Alan

ROBOT DOM.

New Moon Critique

OMB, just realized that my first blog on this site was, well not dedicated to Twilight, but a critique of the movie and other things. After watching the movie New Moon in theaters 3 times and a couple times over the internet, I think it's fitting to write a critique on the second film of the "Saga."

First, I'd like to say that everyone is giving this Vampire love story far too much credit. I'll admit that I am one of those people. (I'm the girl who read it in 7th grade and told errbody that I loved it, but then nobody really cared, and then I found a friend who loved reading as much as I do, and then we obsessed over what I call Teen Books and got the books as soon as they came out. And NOW we can cash in and say everyone is late at reading. Even Britney Spears here. We read that in 2nd grade, honey.) But I also think that Vampires are never going to fall in love with me and be all sparkly and "vegetarian." The theater -- all three times -- was filled with younger kids: Teeny-Boppers and older women: Twi-Moms. Creepy, lots of yelling and cheering and howling (though that was me).

Now for the real stuff: Cinematography and Effects.

UPGRADE.

Fast motion scenes? Intense. Things in the shot that you don't see until you've watched it a few times, trust me.

Beasts? Hell yeah. Not as amazing as Transformers and Harry Potter, but now everyone's seeing the money that flows from this "Saga."

Action shots? Try to make you feel like you're actually there, love it.

There were less landscape shots, but when you've got a story to tell, you've got to tell a story.

Actors

K. Stewart: Better, by only a margin. Wtf is with the yelling in bed? I don't know anyone who yells like they're about to give birth when they have nightmares. There are just some awkward motions she does, but I guess that makes her seem more like a person, rather thanjust some character. So GOOD JOB, if that was intentional.

R. Pattinson: Not in too much of it, but I'm beginning to think that that was a good thing. I feel uncomfortable watching him on screen, he doesn't look like he's really into the character, well either that or he's over doing it.

T. Lautner: Okay, someone needs to take classes. Nice try, but I didn't buy a word he said. I think that's why he was shirtless the entire time, his acting may not be good, but DAMN lookee those abs!

Other Vampires:

Meh, still not feeling it from "Jasper," but even still much better than last year's constipation.

Alice is doing pretty good, great facial expressions and body language.

Esme, Rosalie and Emmett not enough to say anything. But P. Facinelli (Carlisle) looking good.

'Bad' Vamps: Dakota Fanning, she really didn't do much, but she's been in the bidness for a long time, I was expecting more.

Aro, the only guy with more than 2 lines, did well.

No one else had more lines than that, thank Blog, I don't think they were selling anything.

Werewolves: Again with the reasoning: THERE MUST BE A REASON WHY THEY'RE ALWAYS SHIRTLESS.

Of course I loved it, whenever someone makes a film out of a book and the outcome is at least DECENT, I will grow an attachment for it. (The same could not be said for The Series of Unfortunate Events movie, which was an "Unfortunate Event" itself.) There have been better movies out there, but New Moon fulfills my movies needs and answered what Jessica in New Moon asked, "Where were all the hot guys and making out?" (However there wasn't too much making out, but a lot of teasing. Had me biting my fist. JUSS PLAYIN'.)

So I've Been Procrastinating.

Though I suppose if you're reading this you are too. My heart goes out to whomever decides to read this. And just for you, I've got a whole bunch of fun little pictures for you to enjoy (and my commentary, of course).

I was watching trailers for upcoming movies off Apple, and I stumbled upon the movie Clash of the Titans which didn't look like it would be interesting, but had like Ralph Fiennes and Liam Neeson. The trailer started off with these gigantor scorpion thingies, and then this guy here sticks his hand out and starts wriggling his fingers. I watched this last week, and now every time I hear the word "grope" (which is surprisingly a LOT) I think about this guy. Disgusting.

And everyone takes those screen pictures of Google giving weird suggestions to searches, so I tried my hand at it and ended up with this right here. I've got to say that I would love to know the answers to these questions, but alas, I do not. However, I'd like to state, that I'd probably never ask Google these questions, (Nipples? Really?) but now I'm stuck wondering how many people did ask these questions? The questions that should be at the top is "Why do people ask stupid questions?" And what do you know?, that's not even on this list. Talk about DENIAL.

And speaking of denial, I will admit that I've been alllll up in my Tumblr as of late and I do regret not Blogger-ing, but Tumbl-ing. Oh my blog.